One of my greatest struggles being here has definitely been learning French. I tried to teach myself a little of the basics before I came but I didn’t push it too much. Plus I heard that I would pick it up pretty quickly once I got here. Well, that has NOT been the case. It’s been a slow process. The town we live in mainly speaks Dagara, so it makes practicing and hearing French a little difficult.
I got a French teacher awhile back, which was seriously an answered prayer for me because I knew I was going to need outside help. Well, that ended up falling though after a couple weeks. So at that point, I didn’t have any books and the Richters have a Rosetta Stone but it’s only on certain computers of theirs. So progress was minimal.
Through this whole frustration of not being able to speak French, I’m learning a lot about myself. I’m learning that I like to find every excuse as to why I’m NOT learning; blaming it on everything I can think of. It’s so embarrassing that I let myself do that for 3 months. Also very hard to admit to considering how many people from back home have supported me, I don’t want to let them down!
I realized that I like to wait for others to take initiative instead of taking initiative myself…afterall, it’s my problem, not theirs. I like to wait around until something happens instead of making things happen!
One thing that’s hard to see as a blessing but I’m thinking maybe I should start seeing it as a blessing is the fact that I’m here alone. ha No interns. No one in our town my age. I don’t have anyone else going through this with me. It makes things difficult at times because I’m the kind that needs someone else who will say “Hey, that’s a good idea, I’ll do that with you!” I don’t think that’s a bad thing, but I’m definitely having to learn how to live without that and be more independent.
I want to BE the kind of person who makes things happen! I want to take initiative! One of my goals from an earlier post was to find a problem and create a solution on my own while I’m here. When I read over that a couple weeks ago, it scared me because I was afraid it might not be something I could accomplish! Considering how dependent I feel like I’ve become since I’ve been here.
I’ve wanted so badly to order my own food. To start a conversations with others in French. To go places on my own. I literally woke up one morning a couple weeks ago and immediately this GUILT like no other was upon me for not knowing more French. But all guilt does is rob us of our present time by letting us sit and dwell on the past instead of changing what happens right now. God doesn’t want that for us! Guilt doesn’t come from God. In this particular moment, that guilt actually kicked me in the butt and motivated me! I decided I’m going to have to be more proactive about this.
So when I went to Kenya, I picked up this French book with audio so I could teach myself.
So all that to say this…I’ve been working hard on my French the last 2 weeks (yes, a whopping 2 weeks after a struggling 3 months) and yesterday I decided to walk over to the boutique BY MYSELF and ask for a drink IN FRENCH. ”Vous avez coca?” I said. Guess what? He understood me!! And I gave him my money and I knew how much to expect back. It was such an exciting feeling. When I hear other people talking and discussing in French, I’m starting to understand the context of their conversation. I have so far to go, this I know
, but I’m am going to use every bit of time I have left here to really learn this language. Not to mention…it’s fun! I love studying languages, I just needed someone to kick me in the butt and say “get going!”
I caught myself asking God a couple times in the last 3 months to bless my efforts to learn and help me to be successful. Dumb. Why would he bless something I’m not working that hard for!? I’m definitely guilty of using prayer as the easy way out sometimes. Thinking “oh if I pray for this, it might make things easier” Not good. Hard work is the way to go, THEN you don’t have to feel bad about asking God to bless it. He would be delighted to help us!
So now I have no hesitation in asking you to be in prayer for me as I study French and interact with the people while I’m here because I WILL be putting forth the effort to learn. I know it will help open doors and provide more ministry opportunities along the way. Pray for diligence and quick learning because the time I have left is going to be gone before I know it! Thanks